To drink tea, or not to drink tea, that is the question...

So I'm a caffeine addict.

I have indulged in the daily activity known as tea constantly since I was about 13. I was introduced to tea when I was about 7 or 8 but the habit really took on in my teen years... I mainly indulged in English Breakfast Tea (strong, black, "working-man" teas from Europe) and coffee, so much to the point that I'm pretty sure it became an addiction. Caffeine was in my blood and I soon became immune to its effects. I had to have at least three shots of espresso for me to actually react. I don't really remember a day I didn't have it.
All throughout highschool, tea was my life. I once meditated on my tea-drinking habits and realized that it had become my water- I didn't think twice before drinking several cups in one sitting. I just did it, and I didn't question it. It had become a part of me. It also was a large part of social interaction, as I would go out to tea and coffee with my friends back in my hometown very frequently. It was just something to do.
Now, herbal teas... yes, I never really was a fan. The one time I had some fruity herbal teas, I woke up with swollen lips and an allergic reaction the next day. Green tea and chamomile were acceptable when I was sick, but it was always the caffeinated ones for me.
So basically, I found out in my junior year of high school that I had the forming of an ulcer at the top of my stomach as a result of stress. My stress was beginning to take a toll on my body, and this ulcer was the living proof of it. The doctor, and various websites, told me that foods such as chocolate, citrus, tomatoes aggravated the ulcer and made it more painful. I also was told that caffeine was a huge danger to my ulcer and would probably hinder its healing. To not... drink tea? I'd never been told that. With much self-control, I limited myself immensely and after a few months the ulcer died down and I didn't hear about it for a while. Cue the continuous tea drinking again.
This summer, my ulcer returned even stronger but this time it was not triggered by stress so much, but the foods I was eating. Apparently, if you have an ulcer once, you're subject to have it keep popping up again in your life. I was upset but this time I took my health a little more seriously. I went on medication and it went away. When I was at the beach this summer, my ulcer had been subdued a bit but I constantly had stomach aches. My grandpa made the comment that I needed to stop drinking tea, to which I disagreed strongly and brushed it off.
So... Here is the rub -----> I came back to college and times were great. Tea drinking was rampant and much was enjoyed. I was playing a sport and my stomach aches were becoming very irritable to me. I realized that I hadn't given my ulcer enough time to fully heal, so on September 19th, I quit drinking tea. I said that day that I wouldn't have caffeine for 31 days (a month), and oh boy was that fun...
So basically, I had never done anything like this before. Quitting a habit that so consumed my life, cold-turkey for a month? I don't know what inspired me to do it so suddenly, but I did it. I hid all my caffeinated tea and only left the green tea (which I absolutely abhorred) out. The first few days were awful. I fell asleep in class, skipped classes and chapel (on purposes or on accident, there was a mixture of both), and just felt so exhausted all together. I had no artificial way of keeping myself awake or alert-- I just had to trust my own amount of sleep and good eating to keep me nourished (banish the thought!).
It was quite irritating because I was very set on keeping this 31 days chaste of caffeine, but it was so so difficult at times. There was free Starbucks on campus one day. My friends would come in my room often and want me to make them (or watch them make, it turns out) tea or espresso. My mom mailed me yummy chai tea and espresso mixes, which I couldn't drink for a month. It was difficult, but so eye-opening.
The month ended a few days ago... Despite feeling sleepy and not getting instant-gratification for my caffeine cravings, several good things did happen over the month. I know, I know... it was only a month. But it really did show me a picture of some things I needed to change.
1. I learned how to listen to my body.
Instead of being jacked up on caffeine all the time, I could actually go to bed when I needed or wanted to! I wasn't kept up for hours because "oops, I had an espresso... time to stay up til 3!". When I was sleepy, I slept. When I was awake, I stayed awake. I also realized that I had been so irritable on days when I lacked sleep and had coffee instead. Now, I realize when I am just plain grumpy and need to take a nap or get over it, instead of being irritable and fueled by caffeine (caffeine drives your heartrate up). I now know that I need to depend on sleep a little more than I used to.
2. I realized how I was lacking moderation with my habit.
5 or 6 cups of tea or coffee a day? That was normal to me?? I just drank and drank how much I possibly could. I didn't think about the calories, the caffeine levels, the dehydration, the stimulating effect on my nervous system, the pure gluttony of sitting in one place and just drinking coffee to get a good energy... it was eye-opening to see how many times I just walked over towards my former tea-station and stood there, waiting for tea. Temperance, Taylor!! I hope I remember this now that I am back on caffeine.
3. Herbal tea is NOT that bad.
I drank green tea several times over my tea-break (no caffeine in it and it's good for you), and... I never thought I say it, but I definitely appreciate herbal teas a lot more. They are such great sources of antioxidants and when you're sick, they boost your immune system or soothe your throat.

I have not mastered moderation, and I will not forever shun caffeine. I have just learned several things over this unique month, and I appreciate everyone who supported me in my efforts. It was simply a month, and it is only caffeine, so it's really not the end of the world. But I should take my health more seriously, and I hope that I can practice more moderation with my caffeine intake-- it's not great on your body! My ulcer has not hurt since I was off caffeine, so my goal was achieved! I hope it remains that way. A little bit of caffeine is fine for you, but beyond that... just take it easy. I have stocked up on some yummy herbal teas, like Sleepytime and Green Tea and Peppermint. It was, however, really nice to finally pull out my Yorkshire Breakfast Tea Box again and have a cup :) Oh tea, how I missed you so. But I don't think I need you as much as I thought.
<3